I expect some of you may be surprised to discover such a ‘heart on your sleeve’ post here, I know it is not your usual Hip Little One material but after laying awake for a few hours thinking of what I wanted to say I felt I had to get it off my chest. Many of you have come to know me through the blog, you have watched our family grow and therefore this little snippet of our family life is worth the share:
When we fell pregnant with baby 4 in 2012 we were terribly excited to share the news with our family, friends and the whole wide world. However our beaming smile soon dropped a few centimetres (in fact it was replaced by tears, due to hormones maybe but tears they were) when we discovered others didn’t share our excitement at all.
Somehow something magically changed in between baby 3 and 4 and all of a sudden our parenting decisions became public property. People seemed to think they had the right to share their negative opinions on large families, question our ability to clothe, feed and spend time with our children, the size of our home and our car. They asked if the baby was an accident, why on earth we decided to have another baby and if we were ‘gluttons for punishment’. From close family to complete strangers, everywhere we went people felt they deserved an explanation and were allowed to judge us on the size of our family. What happened to ‘If you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all’?…
Slowly but steadily, and even though we didn’t want it to and I know I shouldn’t let it get to me, I started to feel our joy trickle away because of this. Looking back I realise that I did not enjoy the pregnancy as much as I wanted to and deserved to due to the words and actions of others. When our sweet little girl was born we had few visitors and received a handful of cards, as if a fourth baby is any less special than a first. Some of the so-called ‘friends’ who we messaged to announce our baby’s arrival did not even respond, as if she was not worth a simple text message. She absolutely is and like all of our children she means the world to us.
If you have seen me around the place lately you may have noticed my round new shape. You may wonder if you missed a unique pregnancy announcement on Facebook, the share of a first ultrasound picture or a cute baby bump shot. It is not that we are ashamed, that this baby was an accident, something we discovered late and are still coming to terms with, something to hide, be embarrassed of or keep secret or even worse, something we take for granted… that’s absolutely not it.
We decided we would rather quietly but deeply enjoy this beautiful gift that has been given to us in our small but happy family setting than for our excitement and joy to be clouded by other people’s lack of manners, their inability to keep their opinions to themselves, their rude comments and their misconceptions about large families. We are happy, our children are happy and that is all that matters to us.
Dear baby no.5, you are very much wanted and wished for, we prayed for you and peed on countless pregnancy tests waiting and hoping to see two pink lines, you are dreamed of and will be doted upon. We cherish you and count the weeks as if you were our first, I proudly show off my growing belly and we are so blessed to be expecting you. We can’t wait to meet you and our family will be happier and better because you will be in it.
17 weeks and counting…
We think our baby is worth celebrating so you are invited to join in our Big Baby Shower giveaway starting today. During the month of May we will be giving away more than $3000 in prizes, how would you like to win a brand new Oyster Max pram (RRP $1048)? Check back every day for our latest giveaway.